There is a hilarious project on GitHub – the website that hosts all kinds of software that programmers want to share – that is quite popular.
The project was shared by a programmer named Nihad Abbasov, also known as "Narkoz" on GitHub. It consists of a bunch of software scripts with some funny but NSFW names. Narkoz says that the script names came from another programmer and tells the story like this:
There was a programmer that use to work at the same company as he did, the type of guy that "if something – anything really – requires more than 90 seconds of his time, how writes a script to automate that."
After the programmer left on his new quest, his former coworkers were looking through his work and discovered that the guy had written scripts for everything, all crazy things, including his relationships and making coffee.
One of the scripts the guy wrote was to send a text message "late at work" to his wife and "automatically picks a reason" from a preset list. It sent the text anytime there was an activity with his login on the company's computer server after 9 p.m.
He wrote another script relating to a customer he did not like, which scans his inbox for an email from the customer that uses words like "help", "trouble" and "sorry" and automatically rolls the guy's database to the latest backup then sends a reply: "No worries mate, be careful next time."
With another script, he automatically fired off an email excuse like "not feeling well, working from home" if he was not at work and logged in to the servers by 8:45 a.m. He called that script "hangover".
And the best one for last, he wrote a script that waits 17 seconds, then hack the coffee machine and orders it to start brewing a latte. The script tells the machine to wait another 24 seconds before pouring the latte into a cup, the exact same time it takes for the guy to walk to the coffee machine from his desk.
His coworkers did not even know the coffee machine was on the network, let alone hackable. You can check out all the script here.